Breathe, Notice, Heal: How Mindfulness and Breathing Techniques Support Emotional Wellbeing

In our modern world, it’s easy to forget the simplest of human acts - to breathe, slowly and fully. We rush from one task to another, barely noticing the rhythm that sustains us. But the breath holds remarkable power.

When we feel anxious, stressed, or overwhelmed, the body’s natural rhythms become unsettled. The heart races, the chest tightens, and our thoughts spiral. Yet, through something as gentle as mindful breathing, we can calm the nervous system, quieten the mind, and begin to restore balance.

As a counsellor, I often introduce mindfulness and breathing techniques to clients who are learning how to regulate emotions and manage stress. These exercises are simple, free, and accessible to everyone - you don’t need to be in therapy to use them.

This article will gently guide you through emotional regulation and relaxation techniques used within counselling, including mindfulness, deep breathing, and emotional check-ins - explaining how they work, what they’re for, and how you can begin using them in everyday life.

Understanding Emotional Regulation

Before diving into techniques, it’s helpful to understand what emotional regulation really means.

Emotional regulation is our ability to recognise, manage, and respond to emotions in ways that are healthy and effective. It’s not about suppressing feelings or “thinking positively” - rather, it’s learning to understand and soothe our emotions, even when they’re uncomfortable.

When emotional regulation is difficult, we might notice:

• Overreacting to small triggers

• Feeling easily overwhelmed or numb

• Difficulty calming down once upset

• Turning to unhealthy coping mechanisms (overworking, scrolling, food, etc.)

  
  

By practising mindfulness and breathing exercises, we can help our body and mind return to a calmer baseline. Over time, these skills strengthen emotional resilience, improve focus, and nurture self-compassion.

🌬️ Emotional Regulation & Relaxation

Counsellors often introduce clients to three core areas of emotional regulation and relaxation:

1. Mindfulness practice — grounding ourselves in the present moment.

2. Deep breathing and relaxation techniques — using breath and body to calm the nervous system.

3. Emotion labelling or “check-ins” — naming emotions to increase awareness and control.

Let’s explore each of these in detail, with examples and simple ways to practise them.

1. Mindfulness Practice

Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention, on purpose, to the present moment — without judgement. It’s not about emptying your mind, but about noticing what’s already here: the feeling of your breath, the sounds around you, or the thoughts passing through your awareness.

🪞 Why it helps

When we practise mindfulness, we train our brain to observe rather than react. This shift creates space between stimulus and response — a pause that allows for calm, thoughtful action instead of impulsive reaction.

Over time, mindfulness:

• Reduces anxiety and rumination

• Improves concentration and sleep

• Enhances emotional stability

• Promotes acceptance and compassion towards oneself and others

  
  

🧘‍♀️ Simple mindfulness techniques

1. Breathing awareness

Find a quiet place. Sit comfortably and bring your attention to your breath. Notice the air moving in and out of your nose, the rise and fall of your chest. When your mind wanders (and it will), gently bring it back to the breath.

Even two minutes of mindful breathing can calm racing thoughts and slow a pounding heart.

2. Body scan meditation

Lie down or sit comfortably. Starting at your toes, slowly move your attention through each part of your body — noticing sensations, tension, or warmth. Breathe gently into each area as you go.

This technique helps reconnect you with your body and is often used to relieve tension and promote relaxation before sleep.

3. Grounding with the senses (the 5–4–3–2–1 method)

When anxiety spikes, use your senses to anchor yourself:

• Name 5 things you can see

• 4 things you can touch

• 3 things you can hear

• 2 things you can smell

• 1 thing you can taste

  
  

This exercise brings you back to the present, reminding your nervous system that you are safe in this moment.

4. Mindful walking

As you walk, pay attention to the sensation of your feet touching the ground, the rhythm of your steps, and the movement of air around you. Mindful walking turns an everyday activity into a meditative moment.

2. Deep Breathing and Relaxation Techniques

Our breathing patterns are directly linked to the state of our nervous system. When we’re anxious or stressed, we tend to breathe shallowly from the chest, which signals danger to the body. Deep, intentional breathing tells the body it’s safe to relax.

Below are the main breathing exercises used in counselling and psychotherapy to support emotional regulation and physical relaxation.

🌿 1. Diaphragmatic (Abdominal) Breathing

Also called belly breathing, this technique engages the diaphragm — the large muscle just below your lungs. It’s particularly effective for anxiety, panic attacks, and general stress reduction.

How to practise:

• Sit or lie comfortably with one hand on your chest and one on your stomach.

• Inhale slowly through your nose, letting your stomach rise (your chest should remain relatively still).

• Exhale slowly through your mouth, feeling your stomach fall.

• Continue for a few minutes, breathing steadily and deeply.

  
  

What it’s for:

• Calming the nervous system

• Reducing heart rate and muscle tension

• Managing anxiety and panic

  
  

🌊 2. Box Breathing (Square Breathing)

A structured technique used by therapists, athletes, and even the military for focus and calm.

How to practise:

• Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds

• Hold your breath for 4 seconds

• Exhale slowly for 4 seconds

• Hold again for 4 seconds

• Repeat the cycle several times

  
  

What it’s for:

• Regulating breathing under stress

• Improving concentration

• Balancing energy and calmness

  
  

🕊️ 3. 4-7-8 Breathing Technique

Developed by Dr Andrew Weil, this is a soothing rhythm that encourages relaxation and sleep.

How to practise:

• Inhale quietly through your nose for 4 seconds

• Hold the breath for 7 seconds

• Exhale audibly through your mouth for 8 seconds

• Repeat up to four cycles

  
  

What it’s for:

• Falling asleep faster

• Calming anxiety

• Reducing racing thoughts

  
  

🌸 4. Alternate Nostril Breathing

A yogic breathing practice often incorporated into mindfulness-based therapy.

How to practise:

• Close your right nostril with your thumb and inhale through the left nostril.

• Close the left nostril and exhale through the right.

• Then inhale through the right and exhale through the left.

• Continue alternating for a few minutes.

  
  

What it’s for:

• Balancing left and right brain activity

• Promoting focus and emotional stability

• Reducing nervous energy

  
  

💫 5. Progressive Muscle Relaxation (PMR)

This isn’t purely a breathing technique, but it works in tandem with breath to release stored tension.

How to practise:

• Starting at your feet, tense each muscle group for 5 seconds, then release and breathe out slowly.

• Move upwards: calves, thighs, abdomen, hands, arms, shoulders, and face.

What it’s for:

• Physical relaxation and grounding

• Managing tension-related headaches or insomnia

• Increasing body awareness

  
  

🌻 6. Guided Imagery and Visualisation

Combines breathing with calming mental images — for instance, picturing yourself in a safe, peaceful place.

How to practise:

• Close your eyes and breathe slowly.

• Imagine a scene that feels safe or comforting — perhaps a beach, forest, or room filled with soft light.

• Engage all your senses: the sound of waves, the scent of trees, the warmth of sunlight.

• Stay in this visualisation for several minutes, breathing evenly.

  
  

What it’s for:

• Deep relaxation

• Reducing stress and pain

• Supporting emotional healing after difficult experiences

  
  

🌬️ 7. Resonance Breathing (Coherent Breathing)

This involves breathing at a rate of around 5–6 breaths per minute — the body’s natural resonance frequency. It synchronises the heart and breath, bringing calm coherence to the nervous system.

How to practise:

• Inhale for 5 seconds, exhale for 5 seconds.

• Continue for 10 minutes if comfortable.

  
  

What it’s for:

• Long-term stress resilience

• Improving emotional balance

• Supporting heart and respiratory health

  
  

3. Emotion Labelling and Daily “Check-ins”

In counselling, we often encourage clients to name their emotions - a process known as emotion labelling. This may sound simple, but it’s incredibly powerful.

When emotions remain vague (“I just feel bad”), the brain can’t process them effectively. But when we put words to our feelings (“I feel anxious and lonely”), the emotional brain calms, and the thinking brain engages.

🧭 How to do a daily emotional check-in

Take a minute to pause, perhaps while having a cup of tea or before bed. Ask yourself three simple questions:

1. What am I feeling right now? (Try to be specific — sad, irritated, hopeful, content.)

2. Where do I feel it in my body? (Tension in shoulders? Fluttering in the stomach?)

3. What might this feeling need? (Rest, reassurance, connection, or action?)

   
   

You can write your answers down or simply notice them. Over time, this daily reflection builds emotional literacy — the ability to recognise and respond to your inner world with care.

Integrating These Techniques Into Daily Life

Practising mindfulness and breathing doesn’t require large amounts of time. What matters is regularity — short, frequent moments of awareness have a cumulative effect.

Here are some easy ways to incorporate emotional regulation into your day:

• Begin the morning with two minutes of mindful breathing before checking your phone.

• Use box breathing during work breaks to reset your focus.

• Do a body scan before bed to help unwind.

• Check in with your emotions while commuting or cooking.

• Practise gratitude journaling alongside your breathing practice for extra reflection.

  
  

You might even combine techniques — for example, deep breathing followed by a short emotion check-in. With consistency, these small acts become a reliable form of self-care.

The Science Behind the Calm

Breathing and mindfulness techniques work because they engage the parasympathetic nervous system — the body’s natural “rest and digest” state.

When you slow your breath, the vagus nerve sends calming signals from the body to the brain. Heart rate drops, cortisol (the stress hormone) lowers, and clarity returns.

This isn’t just relaxation — it’s physiological regulation. You are, quite literally, retraining your nervous system to respond to stress more gently.

When to Seek Additional Support

While mindfulness and breathing exercises are valuable tools, they are not a substitute for therapy if you are experiencing ongoing distress, trauma, or depression.

If emotions feel too intense to manage alone, or if you find yourself feeling worse after practising, it’s important to reach out for professional support. Counselling provides a safe, confidential space to explore what lies beneath and learn personalised coping strategies.

A Closing Reflection

You don’t have to be in crisis to start caring for your mental health. Learning to pause, breathe, and notice your emotions is one of the kindest things you can do for yourself.

When life feels chaotic, your breath is always there — a quiet anchor, a reminder that calm is possible even in difficult moments.

So tonight, before you close your eyes, take one slow, conscious breath. Feel your chest rise and fall. Let the breath remind you: you are here, you are safe, and you are doing your best.

🌿 A Gentle Invitation

If you’d like to explore these techniques more deeply or learn how emotional regulation can support your wellbeing, I’d love to guide you.

Through compassionate, tailored counselling at wecounsel.co.uk in Ilford, Greater London, we can work together to help you understand your emotions, build calm into your life, and reconnect with yourself - one mindful breath at a time.

Warmly,

Saleha Choudhury

Counsellor

wecounsel.co.uk